Listening back to last week’s Woman’s Hour show on masturbation here I was bummed to realise how much of what I’d said had been cut. Luckily, I gained some consolation from none other than Betty Dodson. This April she did a TV interview with National Geographic TV and the same thing happened to her. Apparently it always happens to her.
“My opening statement was loud and clear: ‘Look guys, let me say this upfront: Nothing I say that has any meaning will ever be aired. As per usual, this interview will end up on the cutting room floor.’”
She told the (all-male) crew that even though the world was being stopped from hearing the truth, they, in the studio would be lucky enough, “to get the real scoop on why you’re not getting laid enough or having mutually orgasmic partner sex out there in the straight world.”
Here’s a shot from this month’s Body Sex masturbation master class in Betty’s apartment in NYC. They’re definitely getting the scoop.
According to Carlin Ross, the former corporate lawyer turned Betty’s “Stunt Cunt,” Betty’s dirty mind now revolves around “alien sex fantasies” which she voices openly in the master class. Fantastic. I’m not surprised though. Back in January this year she told me that she wasn’t averse to the beliefs of the Raelians, the American organisation which believes that the “Sky People” want us to have lots of sexual pleasure in our lives. “I’d rather have the E.T people than the Jesus Christ people,” she told me. The Raelians also pay for reconstructive surgery to victims of FGM so I’m down with them too.
But back to Betty’s censored National Geographic interview. At one point the male interviewer gets hot under the collar and jokes that he needs a cold shower. Betty scolds, “Are you crazy? Don’t waste a perfectly good hard-on, go to the john and jerk off. Orgasm energy improves our creativity.”
I’m not sure what Lauren Laverne did after the recording but the producer of Late Night Woman’s Hour came into the studio with this panicked look on her face and said, trying to sound cool, “well, that certainly wasn’t boring!” There are no windows in a recording studio and the tension was, let’s say, thick. And yes I did go home and jack off. I have a new method I might reveal some time soon.
Something I must remember next time is Betty’s tip about channeling the postmenopausal orgasmic crone Baubo, “a Greek goddess who still has a functioning vagina along with a bawdy dirty mouth.”
Here’s a picture of Baubo from Google:
Her lower body is her face and her vulva is the bottom of her face. Gives a whole new meaning to the idea of a “cleft chin.”
You can read Betty’s full rant about all the “lame-o” questions she gets asked in her media interviews at: